I looked out the window the other night while I was -errr- using the bathroom at work before I left to go home. The rotten thing for me this time of year is how I feel some days. The gray days and wintry weather makes me feel blah. Not to mention the cycle of go to work in the dark, come home in the dark. As I glanced out that window and I saw the rain falling down making the whole world out there sparkle. The twinkling of the red brake lights on the cars and the green light on the traffic signal gave me pause - I thought how Christmas-like the scene was and it made me smile. A rush of thoughts flooded my vision.
Marisa giggles and dances like mad to the dogs barking Jingle Bells version. She gets giddy about those holiday dogs yapping away and it sends a rush of pleasure through my system to see her get so excited about such a silly little Christmas song.
Matthew is fascinated by the elf that visits our house. He even drew a huge elf picture to give to Ralph in order to make up for his transgressions! Everyday he asks "is it Christmas today?" and he looks so bummed when we say it is not. It must be so hard to wait for such a huge event and also to be "good" for so many hours and days at a time before the big day.
I love to drive through our neighborhood after my workout each evening. We live in the best neighborhood in this town though of course I know I am biased ;)In our neighborhood, people do it up right! It is lovely and gawdy and cracks me up and thrills me and makes me happy to live where I live. I love those new people up the street on the corner who have a hologram machine that lights up the entire side of their house and the people on the next street who have so many lights on their house it seemingly makes our house light up as well! To this day, I remember driving in the country to the gingerbread lighted house in upstate NY - how magical is seemed to see that big old farm house lit up, how it would appear over the next hill. Now I live in that place where people drive out to see the lights and that makes me so infinitely happy!
We snuggle up on Matthew's bed to read one of many Christmas books. Some were mine, some were Kevin's, some are new. Matthew can almost repeat those stories verbatim. "Oh this is one about the baby Jesus." "Frosty - YEAH!" "Santa Mouse Mommy please read that one!" I remember my brother and sister sitting on the bed with me and I was four. They are reading to me from 'Twas the Night Before Christmas and I was so excited I could hardly stand it. That distinct feeling stays with me all these years later of how sure I was I could hear the reindeer on the roof, their bells jingling.
In remembering the sweet moments around the holidays, I peer down the way at the green and red lights on the street below and I am reminded this season is not about the stuff, or the events, but about the magic, the wonderful feelings and memories that will go on and on for years to the point where a little part of me still holds out hope for a real Santa Claus and elves laboring away in the North Pole. Christmas is about people having spirit - the gifts and stuff are lovely but the spirit of the season is most important to me - this year especially.