Monday, July 12, 2010

Time Passage

Crispy Apple Tree
Summer Bells

I spent some time in the yard this past weekend. 
It was a long frustrating weekend for me. 
Exhaustion seemed to terrorize me no matter what I did.
Struggling with decisions to change our lives...
For good?  For bad?  For what?
I tried to concentrate on something, anything but I could not.
I was suddenly struck by how quickly
this summer is flying past, how I am not paying attention.
I am generally not like this.
This made me sad and mad.
Then I noticed summer all around me.
In our gardens filled with squash and apples and hot summer heat.
Flowers bright, blooming their incredible colors, like a row of Las Vegas showgirls.
Leaves so green and yet clear at the same time, so that I want to peer through them.
Wee fat baby frogs that we caught and held in the palms of our hands.
Watching Marisa's eyes crinkle up in the corners as she giggled at the frog hopping around.
The way dragon flies flit overhead eating their prey
as I sit on the back deck watching the sun set,
a cold drippy beer in one hand and a good book in the other.
Matthew suddenly so big that he fits in the last size of "kids" shoes, comfortably.
I had to roll that number around in my mouth a few dozen times: 13 13 13 13 13.
Practicing Baseball in the yard in his new "fast shoes".
Summer heat, buzzing bugs, hot, greenness with seemingly no end and yet...
Summer is rolling past.
I had to stop and grab some it.
The sky so blue, the fluffy powder white clouds.
The year more than half over.
I hope I do not keep missing it,
that is what I hoped this past weekend.

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