Thursday, July 14, 2011


M Bug is a master manipulator.  I think this is because he rules the roost some times and he knows how to get to us especially when he gets it in his head that he wants something.  He will not back down and I think he firmly believes if he asks enough, hounds us really, that he will get what he wants.

Literally yesterday he pitched a fit for an hour and a half about watching a 2nd television show.  I think he was also upset because I gave Missy the right to watch her own show rather than letting him watch two of his shows.  I did not give in and, wait for it, I remained calm (mostly).  I did cry at one point.  I hate that I cry.  Dudes, I cry at the drop of an effing hat.  Always have.  No matter how hard I try not to, it just happens.  I chalked it up to emotional maintenance!  Ha.

It was a dawning revelation during this epic fit that he is manipulating the situation. Sure, I have had this passing thought over time with him but this was first time I really chewed on this idea and determined it is partly true.  He knows that if he makes me cry, if he fights hard enough we might maybe will give in and if we do not he will literally fall asleep trying, fighting, to get his way.

The thing with M Bug is that he is smart (too smart for his own darn good) and he does not back down (good and bad) and he is just at that age (oh please oh please let this just be an at that age thing!).

He does want/need more freedom, he does want/needs to make more of his own decisions and he does not want to follow the rules because the ones he makes in his mind are better and I/we really need to let him make mistakes and try out the things he wants to try within reason.  But oh my god, that is hard.  I know it is hard and I am trying with all my might to just let things be.  To not control the situation (total control issues, I know this I KNOW!)  and to just let him try to do things on his own that I know in my mind he is very capable of. 

If we gave him more freedom and let him do more of his own ideas I do think life would not be so bad.  I am trying... it is hard.  I fear that if we do not give in now on little simple things, I will hate the teenage years with him!  UGH.  Parenting is not easy, so worth it, but not easy!
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