No for something a little less… depressing. Why yes I said it. I have been down in the dumps depressed and I know it. That makes my depression even lamer. And the non-stop worries and lame loud voices in my head creating stress out of conversations that are meaningless? DRIVING ME CRAZEE…
So I am training for a half marathon and within that half marathon training I am running a half marathon. Weirdo. I am excited to be taking on the two half marathons.
My big issue right now is that I have a heel issue. Plantar fasciitis maybe? I am kind of in a rock and hard place though. We have spent so much on medical stuff for me (with no fucking results) that I do not want to schedule any more appointments. I would love to see the sport and wellness people about this but I still need like four teeth fixed and dude my stomach rocks and rolls when I forget to take Prilosec. What a fucking mess. I should probably do a follow up visit with the GI for other test that was suggested. I just feel like an asshole that (a) they did not give me a solid solution to my teeth rotting out of my head and (b) all of that nothing-ness felt like it came at a huge cost/price to us. There are a lot of things I could do of course they all cost money that comes out of our health pocket.
So I have kind of been just struggling by. Being so sick for two weeks and literally not wanting to run was hard. I missed two weeks of training. I am glad I trained all the way through December and January but man it is hard to admit defeat from a cold during those two weeks. I find myself mentally grumbling about running. Mostly it is about finding the time but sometimes it is about other things. Like getting out on a cold wet icky night to making myself go to gym or just feeling like I am being too selfish with my running time and not giving all of myself to the kids or K. This is funny because the reason I even started to run was to take care of myself, my emotional and physical self.
Ah so training. It gives me a purpose. It makes me get out there to do the running and mostly it is not rough. It is this time of year in part. The dreary I want to be running outside but I am stuck again on the treadmill or the overly crowded Y track. The best part about training is that it just happens. I hit a flow time where I just go and do it and it is okay. I think once the weather dries out a bit and I can run outside more often I will find that flow again. I love the longer distance training and the fact that I have mostly been randomly running mileage with no mission for almost three months makes a real plan, two real races to train for even better.
AND I am on the never ending quest to find a new pair running shoes. I have been in Saucony for a couple of years now. The issue I have with them is this. They are a short life shoe. Like 2-3 months with moderate training. They got me away from the never ending shin splints and hip joint pain but now I have the above mentioned ankle/ heel pain that I have run through since last year’s marathon training. So I have pain in my feet and pocketbook. I would like to find a shoe that reduces ALL pain. I do not think this is necessarily the way I am running or the amount of mileage I run either. I think this is a fit issue and I run on the treadmill/track versus outside thing. When first got into the Kinvara’s it was the middle of outdoor running and they were fab. Then I had to go indoors and that is where all of the pain started. I think I want to stick with Saucony. I am not a Nike or Adidas. I have never tried New Balance and I have heard nasty things about Newtons. I hated the MizunosM and Asics I have had in the past. There are a few brands I missing I know. The thing is I just want a solid shoe without have to see a doctor to get Orthotics because another doctor, another (big) cost. NO. So my mission right now is that I find some new shoes that work before both races.
That is all I have. This is a long boring rambling piece on running of all things. SORRY.